How Do Sociopathic Narcissists and Liars Sleep at Night?
Q: How Do Sociopathic Narcissists and Liars Sleep at Night?
A: This is unfathomable and continues to be a mystery to me, however in recent years I have researched this phenomenon and have some thoughts to share. For the longest time I lived in a bubble of naivete where I actually thought most everyone had other people’s best interest at hand. Of course, there were the cases of characters such as Charles Manson or Jim Jones where it was obvious to the outside world that these men had a serious fetish of absolute distaste for humanity and would only use it to enhance their control and power over others. I often wondered how people such as these, with an utter lack of respect for human life, could live with themselves.
Now, after having been in an intimate relationship with one, I actually have some insight. The first thing I noticed was a lack of empathy, a total disconnect from the ability to see from another’s point of view or even gleam an ounce of authentic care towards the other person, much less give them any sort of attention unless there was a thorough cost/benefit analysis in their favor. If that person was perceived as “valuable”, then a grace period would follow, working the relationship solely for personal gain. The moment a soul either realized who they were dealing with or even dared to question the authority of said sociopath, they would immediately be exiled from the group. The group. The need to belong…a basic need twisted and distorted to manipulate even the strongest of us.
This is also how bullies in school act, vicious children, preparing for a future of brutality. They gather others to rally with them as they stalk and intimidate those they seemingly perceive as weak. However, it is clear as day that working from their fear-based reality, they are the ones who are actually afraid of what they don’t understand. And often, what they don’t understand is their own humanity.
In witnessing the current landscape of our national politics and the locker-room behavior coming from our “leaders”…the disrespect, the lack of empathy, the demeaning nod towards lunacy, the overriding of the majority of voices pleading for justice, I am reminded of these haunting days from my past and am here, from where I stand, to call a spade a spade. Ultimately remembering that everyone of us is a reflection of the other and that the days of hiding from ourselves are over if we want to seek real solutions.
