How Does It Feel to Become?
Q: How Does It Feel to Become?
A: If only I was a Monarch Butterfly, it wouldn’t be a question of whether to dissolve from my previous state into another or not, it would simply be so. And the invitation is here for us humans as well. The problem is etymological - we just don’t have a socially accepted vocabulary for (or a scientific method to prove) that which is so organic and naturally occurring in our psyche, if we allow it.
Lately, I’ve been delving into the science of how a caterpillar becomes a butterfly, not just the metaphor but getting into the biologic miracle of transmutation from one form to another. And before we even come close to the majestic dissolution of self, i.e. morphing from one alienesque creature to the next as a caterpillar to butterfly or as a girl becoming a woman, there are the stages of shedding layers we no longer need that we endure as part of the process.
What do I mean by this? A baby caterpillar is similar to a seed. A small seed gives birth to immense trees; the caterpillar gives birth to wings. Yet even getting to that possibility requires so much transformation, five phases or instars to be exact. Now, let’s weave in and out of imagining ourselves as these little beasts for fun and solidarity. From the first moment the caterpillar comes alive, endearingly referred to as moth larva, all it wants to do is eat and eat it must as there is only one objective at this stage - to stay alive!
Then comes the awkward phase, molting occurs during what is otherwise known as the second instar of the caterpillar. Can you relate psychically? The discomfort of needing to shed layers of a previous state. Remember puberty? Transitioning into a new job? Or perhaps a divorce? You can’t take your old skin (or baggage) with you in order to grow and the shedding becomes inevitable - such a profound metaphor.
The journey continues as the caterpillar eats its way through life, much like we do digesting social media, music, opinions, films, etc. Eat, birth new skin underneath, shed old skin - molt and reveal. Push repeat for the third and fourth instar. By now there is finesse, a refinement of stature as a fully formed caterpillar or “adult” in our case. We’ve worked hard for this elegance. And now it is our time to shine...or dissolve?
Eating its way into its last molten (lava) experience, the fifth instar pupates and spins a silk lasso to attach itself to a kindred plant being. Eating, ‘life’-ing, and more eating into a molten sphere whereas the internal new skin becomes the actual chrysalis. This is sometimes referred to as the infamous mid-life crisis(chrysalis). This is the point of no return. We are now officially heading into metamorphosis.
A new mouth for song, antennae for psychic transmission, and of course the wings for soaring are all formed within this mystical intra-restructuralization. Almost two weeks (two months/years/decades - this is up to you) of intensity within the self-created womb before emergence graciously appears. And this doesn't just happen, we have to work for it. “We” as in the butterflies that transform on the regular, those who ache for change of mind, heart, and habit as much as they feel the draw to fly into the mystery.
Fluids are pumped from the origin of the abdomen, coursing through the internal rivers of veins out into the stretches of the wings. With this radiance of new vitality comes the expansiveness of readiness. The last stretch is to bathe in the glory of the light, as the breath of life touches our wings, we must exercise our newfound muscles before we can take flight!
This new moon encourages us to spread our wings and soar. As far as I can see, the only options are to take the leap into the unknown territory ahead in full faith. Swoon into an unbridled future of eclectic possibility as Saturn, Jupiter in an exact conjunct with Venus, Mercury, Sun, and Moon all traverse the vast frontiers of Aquarius, giving us just the right amount of radical insight to ensure enough cosmic wind will swoosh beneath our wings.
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We cannot change the world until we accept we are the world. This is the new conversation.
