How Does It Feel to Express Freely?
Q: How Does It Feel to Express Freely?
A: Liberation! After a decade of swallowing my thoughts and emotions due to fear, I now face a new and welcomed type of trepidation. No longer am I hiding behind a mask or behind an image of perfection. I am completely free in my humanness and with an ever-growing hunger to express that which has been oppressed within me for so long. I remember when I first started my professional journey in development for a non-profit in San Francisco. I was the only woman surrounded by 5 Alpha Males. I would watch them vie for leadership and attempt to outsmart one another with their intellectual chess moves from across the board room. I would feel an emotion; an idea would arise and it would take all I had to gather the strength to speak it into that wolves’ den. I would sweat, my throat would tighten and my heart race. Finally, I would speak and for an instant they would listen, nod their head and then very quickly dive back into the ring with the boys. That never felt good and I knew then I had much work to do to find my authentic and empowered voice.
Only now, 20 years later, am I experiencing an opening from within my root, my solar plexus, my heart, my throat, even my eyes that is encouraging an uninhibited expression of who I am becoming. I feel inspired and my heart is still racing at times, yet it is because of the immense creativity flowing through my soul like a tsunami begging to be shared, not because I am holding myself back in the same way. The journey is a long one and I am so glad to finally be beginning, again.
