What Did You Learn in 2020?
Q: What Did You Learn in 2020?
A: This year of years has proven to accelerate every other process in its wake. What do I mean by this? When we are in a crisis, regardless if it is personal or global, we are forced to reconcile with what is truly important. Priorities are highlighted amidst the necessity to remain centered while navigating the challenging terrain of the unknown.
Due to the lack of linear form we have now entered within the portal of this new decade, there is no particular order of lessons to discover. Each cosmic teaching disguised within the mundane is a world of its own, each moment a continuation of the one before and a prequel to the movie of our future. While on the river of deep gratitude one has the opportunity to arrive at the basecamp of what is Awesome. May that which we have learned in this past year prepare us for what has yet to come.
Below are a few of my favorite takeaways from this year:
Adventured - When pulled out of a Vipassana retreat in central California on day three due to a mandatory lockdown last March, my hopes for a much needed silent retreat quickly became an opportunity to overcome the numerous obstacles to find my way home safely. A surreal journey, two car accidents, and a whiteout blizzard later, I arrived back in Jackson, Wyoming healthy and in awe of the global situation unfolding. What came afterward was an empath's greatest challenge, what felt like the world rolling through a death, rebirth, and transformation cycle simultaneously moving through my heart, body, and mind. The whales sang, the cosmos rang, and the collective grieving began.
Serviced - At Joan of Sparc, we've been able to clearly assess our strengths and weaknesses as a company. Truly, we were made for these times, the unknown is our territory and instead of falling short, we have forged ahead. Our strengths have outshined any weaknesses tenfold, and I couldn't be more elated by my teammates, our collective level of fervor, and a willingness to show up. In the first month of quarantine, we gave all of our services for free to our national community. This was a no brainer. Now, like many of our fellow startups, we are still navigating the current economic waters as best we can, full sails ahead. During this past year, we launched a new digital astrology program, gained hundreds of new community members, offered two rounds of The Inner Journey 7-week course, hosted a successful virtual launch party for my first book with the same title The Inner Journey as we launched Sparc Press and are gearing up for our first membership launch in January 2021. It is a gift to be able to serve our community in the name of proactive mental health and it is my greatest hope that we can continue to do so with inner work as our fuel for inspiration.
Inner Worked - On a deeply personal level, I have been focusing on unraveling the insidious serpents of self-deception that have been strangling me from within. It hasn’t been pretty, and the worst is that there is so much yet to uncover. With a privileged life that I am incredibly grateful for, I am also very aware of what that has kept me safe from and ignorant to simultaneously. There are levels and levels of inner work and this unites us across every race, every gender, and every economic disparity. None of us will get out of here alive, however, each of us can leave here more alive than when we arrived. This inspires me and inner work is the universal language I seek to connect through with every human being.
Forged - Too much work for this Capricorn has left me feeling like toast. I have learned a very important lesson around taking more time off to rest which is not easy for me when the internal momentum runs hard. I’ve felt a bit scraped by the colossal waves of intensity during this entrepreneurial precariousness and have needed refuge amidst the storms. Running a company is 100% psychological and an experience I wouldn’t trade for anything. There are moments and there are moments, the highs and the lows, the surges of wins versus the tremendous blows are worthy of the exhilarating and (at times) excruciating effort required.
Inspired - At the moment of change, there are so many directions one can go. I choose to go within, deep inside my personal sanctuary of truth and meaning, seeking solace in the bosom of my creator and being. I enter into prayer, and at times a process of rebirth, as fantasies and falsities are stripped away by default in the act of the inner journey. The visions have been formidable while seeding a new future deep within my psyche. There is a knowing of possibility, the sun’s light through the dense fog of uncertainty, and a beam of courage that shall accompany me into the crevasse between point A and B. There is no ascension without the descent and something tells me we’ve got further to go in our understanding of where we have been before we may triumph into the victorious reprieve of where we are going.
Surrendered - November was a month of deep fortifying pain. Emotional attachments to mental creations are bound to cause exaggerated levels of suffering. This is especially the case when one is dedicated to the abstraction of such self-creation in order to awaken to the truth beyond self-deception. Layers of holding onto false identities began to slough off one by one with incredible psychological efforts only to establish a new relationship with relaxation.
Sieved - The closing of 2020 has me feeling like I’ve been emulsified after having gone through a sieve, leaving behind what no longer is needed. It hasn’t been an easy process and I’m still feeling some disorientation within the new orientation : ). Raw is another word that could express my current state, naked from the past and lightened after having let it go. Four years of chronic pain still draining in the metaphoric shower of my memories and I am cautiously enthused as I prepare for the year ahead.
Graced - From the depths of my heart I give thanks to my Lord, Father/Mother God… my internal Being. Through every ache of my heart and every turn of events, the good, the bad, and the ugly---I have felt the unwavering thunderous presence of Grace. This year has changed my life forever and I am just beginning to see the first rays of the exalted sunlit path before me. The challenges are not over, the fortifying will continue, and yet my heart is expanding at light speed inviting me into an unknown world to discover. A thousand thank yous and a honeyed kiss from my heart upon the gifts received and receiving.
May this full moon in Cancer nourish every cell of your holy trinity---body, mind, and heart with love,
Ciela
We cannot change the world until we accept we are the world. This is the new conversation.
